thousand-gifts — See Jamie blog

Learning what {mothering} really is

on May 14, 2012

For almost three years now, I’ve mothered Lindsey. I’ve cooked meals + washed clothes + set up dentist appointments + driven her to activities + made her clean her room + took care of her when she was sick. Lindsey knew she missed out in her early years on some of what a mother does, but it never occurred to her that “mothering” means those things, but far more.

She and Ken quickly developed a good father-daughter relationship, and that has grown and deepened. She doesn’t always like all his fathering (and protecting), but she loves her Daddy. She and I, on the other hand, easily anger each other, and some days just being in the same house is hard.

Over these three years, though, there have been a few times when she has come to me to talk, to hug, to cry. We’ve had some meaningful talks. On those rare times, it feels like a mother-daughter relationship should. Those times feel good — but still so rare.

And I wonder if my influence matters at all; I wonder if she’ll ever understand what mothering really is.

Ambulance Ride

Saturday morning, just before a JROTC performance at the local Air Force base for Academy Day, Lindsey woke up surrounded by EMTs after passing out and hitting her head on the concrete floor, and immediately cried, “I want my Mama!!!” She kept on, and told them my name, and I had no idea why the speaker at this event was calling my name in front of these hundreds of people and cadets and military men and senators, but I stood and went up front and they took me to her. I helped calm her down, I answered medics’ questions, and I rode in the ambulance with her (as Ken followed behind in the car).

Several hours and several tests later, she was sent home from the hospital with a big bump on her noggin (and an even bigger headache), and she is fine.

At some point in the midst of all the chaos that has given me more gray hair, it occurred to me that it was me she asked for. Not Ken. Not anyone else. She asked for her mama, and she meant me.

So I think, maybe we really are making progress.

Maybe she’s learning what a mother really is.

1264 – dinner with all 3 kids, plus our soon-to-be daughter (in law)
1265 – helping stamp and seal Brandon and Diane’s wedding invitations
1266 – serving again at the soup kitchen
1276 – watching hummingbirds while I sit on the back porch
1277 – Ken rescued a nuthatch from inside the bird feeder
1278 – both girls are excited about signing up for fall homeschool enrichment classes (even Lindsey!)
1279 – my Fun Mama post was featured on BlogHer
1280 – finishing our homeschool year
1281 – a new (used) car
1282 – Lindsey is okay
1283 – she asked for me
1284 – I don’t freak out in a crisis
1285 – my own mom, and the example she set for me in what mothering means

Thank you to all my mom-friends — and my own mom — who inspire me.

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Filed Under: adoption, thousand-gifts Tagged With: parenting

The day God gave me an elephant.

on May 7, 2012

Right now Jolanthe and the rest of the Compassion Bloggers are in Tanzania. As I’m following along (you can follow along with them, too!), I’m thinking again about Africa and the mission trip I took in 2009 to Botswana and South Africa with a group from my church.

………………………………….

I never thought I’d want to go on a mission trip.
But God changed my heart. And now I long to go on another trip.

I never would have expected to go to Africa.
But God gave me this trip, the people, the lessons learned. The whole experience was a gift.

I NEVER would have expected to go on Safari.
But God is an extravagant giver.

It’s a long way to Africa, and we didn’t know if we’d ever have another opportunity to go there, so for one day, before heading home, our group went on safari at a game preserve in South Africa.

Driving in, before we’d even “officially” arrived, we saw kudu, impala, zebra, and giraffe.

The lodge was spectacular: wonderful accommodations, delicious food, great personnel. After the week we’d spent in the city, we were finally surrounded by what looked the Africa of my imagination, complete with monkeys and real Africa-looking trees.

We went to our rooms to get settled. The rooms were really individual cabins, with a true thatched roof, fireplace, and a view out on hills where we watched zebra and wildebeest graze. Walking through our room, I got teary-eyed, thinking about how my God was blessing me. Wondering why He was blessing me, of all people.

I never have trouble accepting God as Creator: huge and powerful and holy. But He feels too BIG to care about “little” things. I never expected Him to go to such great lengths to teach me that He is involved in the tiniest of details of my life.

We headed back to the lodge for lunch. Again, I was just overwhelmed at what I was experiencing.

Then, God gave me an elephant.

An elephant.

Here I was — a girl who grew up watching and absorbing all the National Geographic and PBS nature shows I could, learning about all the great variety of animals in the world but NEVER dreaming I’d see something like an elephant, one of my favorite animals, outside of a zoo. But an elephant walked by, and it looked at me.

I was my typical, excited self, and couldn’t believe I was looking at a wild elephant, walking 20 or 30 feet from me. As the realization of this hit me, I started to cry. This was, to me, nothing short of a miracle. A divine gift. If we hadn’t seen any other animals the whole time, I would have been completely content. I ran down the boardwalk to an observation area that overlooks a watering hole, and watched the elephant drink, play, and bathe. I’m not one to cry in front of other people, but I couldn’t help it; I just kept crying at the wonder of it all. At the wonder of GOD!

I finally composed myself enough to eat, and as we sat outside having lunch, we saw a group of baboons up on the hill. First the big leader, checking things out, then the rest of his group. Our South African friends identified some of the birds we’d been seeing, like an iridescent blue-colored glossy starling. I wish I could’ve gotten a good photo of the birds we saw there.

We headed back to our rooms to rest until time to go out on safari that evening. Our friend who was staying in the room just past ours said he’d just seen a monkey run off of our porch. We laughed and said, “Good thing we closed all the doors like they told us to!” But when we got in our room, we saw that the monkey had been in there, opened our tea caddy, and stolen (and spilled) packs of sugar! Turns out he’d come in a small window over the toilet, which we hadn’t thought to close. How funny! So we cleaned up the spilled sugar, made ourselves some tea, and closed the window over the toilet!

One of our team members, who has been to Africa and on safari many times before, told us that morning that he wanted to be on the vehicle with us to see our reactions. As I said before, I was VERY enthusiastic about everything! I don’t think I disappointed him with my excitement level. As soon as we had set out, and I leaned forward to say,

“Hey Jeff!
(pause for response)
Guess what…
We’re in AFRICA!
(another pause)
And guess what else…
We’re on SAFARI!!!”

We drove around looking for critters.
Soon, our guide found lions! LIONS!!!

Golden light, golden grass, golden lion, and I was taking pictures of two handsome lion brothers who work as a team. Big, powerful, lion brothers. They were lazing about, and almost looked cuddly. Seemed like you could just go scratch that big ol’ mane and give ‘em a belly rub. Jeff reminded me: that’s what we’ll be able to do in heaven. Can you imagine?

Eventually we moved on, saw more critters, then stopped for a “sun-downer.” How lovely! A little biltong (African beef jerky), crackers, and a sparkly (non-alcoholic) beverage while we watched the sunset over the African plains. The guides even pulled out a table and tablecloth to set up for us. Unbelievable: that was the word I keep saying about everything; I just couldn’t grasp that this was all really happening. It felt like a dream!

After the sunset, we loaded back up, found a big herd of buffalo, and I had the first bit of disappointment: these were not water buffalo, but cape buffalo, which meant the Veggie Tales silly song I had planned to sing was not applicable. A few of the giant hairy things stared us down, but I don’t think any of them got fully into what our guide called “the death stare.” That’s a good thing, I’m thinking.

Just before it was completely dark, a family of elephants crossed nearby. I loved seeing the babies following along, flanked before and behind by moms, aunts, and older siblings.

Soon, it was dark. No streetlights, no nearby cities, just the almost full moon. DARK.

Our guide drove the dirt road while sweeping a spotlight all around in search of a leopard (which proved to be elusive). Then we came upon another set of brother lions lying right in the middle of the road! These guys had been hurt in a territory dispute with the first set of lions we saw, but our guide said they seemed to be doing better. We drove off-road to go around them, and stopped near to see them closer. Then the lion closest to us looked RIGHT at me and Ken, and our guide said (for the first time that day), “No one make any sudden movements.”

Not a problem. Gulp.

After a few tense moments, the lion broke eye contact, but he did get up, and walked to the other side (MY side!) of the vehicle. This is not the best shot of the lion but let me just point out that the white part I chose not to crop out of the right side of the photo is my seat! In the very open (see sun-downer photo above!) vehicle, I might add.

After that excitement, we continued back towards the lodge. The temperature dropped significantly once night fell, and I was cold, but it felt great. We saw a big eagle owl, a chameleon, and this rather large (four TON) fellow walking down the middle of the road towards us!

Our guide had turned off the vehicle, as they always did when we stopped to see an animal. But the elephant kept coming, so our guide started the vehicle and backed up a bit, to send the elephant a message that we were not going to be a problem for him. But the elephant kept coming. Our guide tried to start the vehicle again — but it didn’t start.

GULP.

The elephant was REALLY close at this point. So we all sat very, very still, and very, very quiet — and did not need our guide to tell us to do so!

It took the elephant a few moments of standing close enough to touch the vehicle before he decided what he wanted to do.

We could see him thinking, swinging his head a bit.

He opted for munching upon a nearby tree limb. We all breathed a sigh of relief. Then our guide proceeded to tell us that this elephant was in musth, which means he had raging hormones that often result in highly aggressive behavior. We watched him a bit longer before heading on our merry way.

During our potentially dangerous lion and elephant encounters, I wasn’t afraid. I felt that God was doing all this to give me a gift beyond my wildest imagination, so I really wasn’t worried about being eaten by a lion or stomped on by an elephant. That’s really saying something, because my tendency is to be very fearful.

The next morning, we went out before all the animals were awake; when we saw this sunrise, we stopped and sang “How Great is Our God.” Because He is!

We saw more zebras, a big bull giraffe, and more impala and kudu. Our guides tracked a lioness, but never found her. I was happy just to be driving around in the gorgeous African outdoors.

We stopped for morning tea, and had yummy biscotti and little pastries to accompany it. I drank tea on safari in Africa. (That is one of the coolest sentences I have ever typed.)

Never underestimate God’s power. love. tenderness. extravagance.

He is beyond our comprehension.

“Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever.” Ephesians 3:20-21

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts Tagged With: Africa, ministry and missions

Gratitude and a TV interview

on March 6, 2012

I was going to post yesterday, but I was busy filming a television interview. I had to type that sentence because it sounds vastly impressive and important, and that makes me laugh at myself. Besides, with as much as I’m sure I babbled, it could very well be the very last time I get to type a sentence like that!

Several of this week’s “thankfuls,” as I call them, revolve around my daughters. I am blessed to have them both, and when I see signs of progress in their relationship as sisters, or in the rest of our inter-family relationships in this blended family of ours, it does my heart so much good. We walk a difficult road sometimes in parenting, so remembering these things is vastly important.

1256 – My daughters have developed a “secret” handshake.
(It involves fins and noggins.)
1257 – Far less walking on eggshells since Lindsey and I had our talk.
1258 – Our daughters’ enthusiasm about adoption. When we talk about adopting again, they both seem genuinely excited, and I won’t be surprised if they both adopt when they are grown with families of their own.
1259 – My daughters are beautiful — and not just on the outside!

1260 – Doing yesterday’s television interview to advocate adoption as a good thing, and share how important permanency is in a child’s life.
1261 – God allows us to be part of what He’s doing — because He could accomplish His work without our “help.”
1262 – I exceeded my blog income goal for 2011. I don’t blog to make money, but it’s nice to make enough to pay for expenses and such!
1263 – Safety in the storms that passed through last week. One tornado touched down between our house and our church. Scary, but no one was seriously injured, which is a huge praise.

Blessings to you this week! And as soon as I find out details of when the interview will air, I will let you know!

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts

Sunshine and Gratitude

on February 27, 2012

Yesterday, in the sunshine of our backyard, Lindsey and I had one of our best talks yet. Earlier in the day, she had gotten angry with me about something I said, something she took entirely the wrong way. I was feeling sad and frustrated that our relationship still isn’t where I’d like it to be — where I feel it needs to be for me to have any influence in her life in the brief years before she’s out on her own. But she came out to talk to me, which was in itself a huge improvement from just a couple of years ago, when she would’ve simply hidden in her room indefinitely. In yesterday’s talk, I was able to tell her many of the things that usually would’ve made her angry, and this time she seemed to really listen, and we had a real conversation. She told me why she got mad, she apologized, and she acknowledged that she took it entirely differently than I had intended. We talked for a long time — sometimes tearfully — and even talked about school, which tends to be a volatile subject.

Lindsey said (not for the first time) that she has a hard time talking to me and trusting that I have her best interest at heart, because “everyone has always walked out on me.” This time, though, it occurred to me (thank you, Jesus!) to tell her, “No. They haven’t. For the first 14 years of your life, that was true, but we haven’t walked out on you and we’re not going to.” I don’t know how long it will take for that truth to sink into her heart, but I’m praying it does.

I wrote all this in my journal this morning as a praise to God, but also as a reminder to myself. I have had great difficulty not letting my frustrations show in my interactions with Lindsey, but that’s not godly parenting, and it’s not what she needs. I prayed this morning that my heavenly Father would help me mother my children with joy, never forgetting what an honor and privilege it is to do so. I prayed that He would help me greet them with smiles, hug them often, and not let their attitudes or responses dictate my attitude towards them. I know the time is short, and I want to make the most of it. (Ephesians 5:16)

More gratitude for the past couple of weeks:

1241 – Finding pants Kathryn likes and will wear — a far bigger deal than it sounds!
1242 – Our “puppy” Lacy turned 5 years old.
1243 – Hosting a few homeschool moms here for a little “ladies’ night out.”
1244 – A Valentine coffee date with my love.
1245 – Even though plans for a getaway fell through, Ken and I still had a weekend alone, just the two of us.
1246 – Uninterrupted conversation with Ken at dinner.
1247 – Yummy breakfast date — and a gift card to pay for it.
1248 – Kathryn’s stubborn tooth (a molar) finally fell out.
1249 – A good visit from my Dad.
1250 – A fun family day with new experiences and the making of memories.
1251 – Amazement at the variety of creatures God made and the intricate detail with which He made them.
1252 – Praying with my husband.
1253 – Flexibility of homeschooling when a child isn’t feeling well.
1254 – Free trial of Netflix allowed us to watch a few educational films on a sick day.
1255 – All that my sister does for my dad with his doctors appointments and such.
1256 – Kathryn was able to do the racer derby, even though we had no idea what night it was and almost missed it. And the fact that our big God cares even about small things like that.
1257 – Sitting in the sunshine, and much-needed talks with the teen daughter God put in my life just a few years ago.

Even when circumstances of life are hard and we can’t see what He could be doing or why, our God is good. He’s been showing me this again lately, and with all that’s going on with my Dad, I really need that reminder.

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Filed Under: family life, thousand-gifts Tagged With: older-child adoption, parenting

Gratitude {1226 – 1240}

on February 13, 2012

“And when I give thanks for the seemingly microscopic, I make a place for God to grow within me.” – Ann Voskamp

1226 – Menchie’s date with Kathryn.

1227 – Learning to be a Fun Mama (more on this in another post).

1228 – Snuggles.

1229 – No incidents in a photography session with a big horse! I used to have horses, but working with a stallion and a client was a completely new experience for me!

1230 – Happy clients.

1231 – Smiley babies. (It’s impossible not to smile back!)

1232 – Ken completed a huge two-year commitment with his CLC group, and came away from this with good friends, more Biblical knowledge, and more confidence in becoming the man God wants him to be.

1233 – Hearing the testimony of a lady who was once a Compassion child and how she was blessed by the support of the organization, and now sponsors her own Compassion child.

1234 – All the people who organize, plan, and host the annual Father-Daughter dance at our church.

1235 – Kathryn and Lindsey both feel loved and special in Ken’s eyes. Not just because of the dance, but it certainly contributed to the feeling.

1236 – The relationship Ken has with both daughters, even though neither of them is his biologically.

1237 – Successfully making a few little projects with my sewing machine. (Mr. Singer and I are trying to become friends.)

1238 – Lindsey’s willingness to talk to a young teen who wasn’t sure whether or not he’d like to be adopted. He has the same caseworker she once had, and is the same age as when Lindsey joined our family.

1239 – Ken was able to do this boy’s photos for his adoption recruitment info.

1240 – Lindsey’s delight at earning a higher rank in JROTC.

Yes, I’m still counting… Join me?

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts

Multitudes (with a dose of bad fashion)

on January 23, 2012

“I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose.” Woody Allen

1213 – Kathryn really enjoys her homeschool enrichment classes.

1214 – Finally getting a much-overdue eye exam, and already having improvement in a weird eyelid rash I’ve had for months!

1215 – Exciting news that my youngest niece is expecting!

1216 – Being listed on a “Top 100 Homeschool Blogs” list.

1217 – We are now re-certified for CPR/first aid, and completed five of the required yearly training hours to maintain our status as approved for foster/adoption.

1218 – Letting my artsy side out a little by doing an art project with my daughter, instead of just observing and instructing. (Our chickadee pastel project.)

1219 – Fun — and funny — memories from old photos my mom dug up.

1220 – I now have better fashion sense than I did in high school.

1221 - More boudoir sessions last week with beautiful (inside and out) Christian wives.

1222 – Families who are committed to raising their children to know and love the Lord. (Baby dedication at church this week!)

1223 – Ken and Lindsey began training to go on the high school mission trip to the Dominican Republic in April. (This will be the second year, and Ken will again be a group leader.)

1224 - Financial blessing that allowed us to pay for mission trip deposits, eye exams and glasses for both me and Lindsey, and the CPR class.

1225 – Spending an afternoon re-living memories with my mom, my aunt, and a cousin while cleaning things out at my grandmother’s house.

Consider counting your gifts, if you haven’t starting doing so already!

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts

More Multitudes { 1200 – 1212 }

on January 16, 2012

(MadLibbing; paper doll version of me; Wii dancing)

1201 – A new friendship.

1202 – Nights I don’t have to cook — or plan the meal!

1203 – Getting to know Lindsey’s boyfriend better.

1204 – A delightful new oolong tea I’ve been drinking.

1205 – When Kathryn asks me to read to her.

1206 – Learning to dream big.

1207 – Recent boudoir sessions with women who want to bless their husband’s socks off.

1208 – Continuing my battle with clutter.

1209 – Repurposing items I already have.

1210 – A friend to brainstorm with.

1211 – MadLibs.

1212 – Old-fashioned fun with paper dolls.

Are you counting your multitudes yet?

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts

Multitudes in the New Year { 1182 – 1200 }

on January 2, 2012

“The game was just to find something to be glad about, no matter what ’twas… you see, when you’re hunting for the good things, you sort of forget the other kind.” Pollyanna

1182 – Christmas cards in the mail.

1183 – Pinterest. I can’t believe I haven’t listed that one before! It’s so fun!

1184 – Sponsoring another Compassion child: Josphat in Kenya.

1185 – Warm brownies fresh out of the oven from our sweet neighbor – and for her thoughtfulness.

1186 – A beautiful pen-and-ink rendering of our home from my talented mom. (Yes, you can hire her to do your home!)

1187 – A good home to Flipper, the big toy horse. (Kathryn had a hard time parting with her until we found just the right home.)

1188 – Christmas-time with Brandon and Diane, and my mom-in-law Joyce last week.

1189 – Easier way to enjoy praise music on my new speaker for my iPhone.

1190 – Serious progress in starting this year’s de-clutter/organize adventure.

1191 – A newly organized closet, thanks to my handy hubby who installed new shelving.

1192 – A new bird feeder and happy birds.

1193 – Sleeping late, and alarm-clock free days.

1194 – A week off work for Ken, and more time spent together.

1195 – Bird songs on rainy mornings.

1196 – Setting up a new home office for Ken.

1197 – Creating my new photography site, and revamping our main site, Worley Arts Photography.

1198 – Photographing the Hodgepodge family! (That’s me with Tricia, aka HodgepodgeMom).

1199 – Kathryn back home after a holiday week at her dad’s.

1200 – The fresh start of a fresh new year.

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts

Another Week’s Multitudes { 1168 – 1181 }

on December 19, 2011

Though the past week brought stress and tears, I’m still counting my blessings…

1168 – A houseful of friends for a coffee and dessert get-together. While they were here, I just enjoyed them, rather than trying to get photos of everyone, which is why I have this photo of a mostly empty dessert table.

1169 – A sink full of dirty dishes as proof those friends were here. {grin}

1170 – I won a book from KatDish!

1171 – Any time I get a bit of new insight into how someone thinks.

1172 – Watching “The Help.” Not quite as good as the book, but I thought it kept the overall feel of the story and the characters, which is quite an accomplishment for any movie, in my opinion.

1173 – Dad still does his “hike-jogs” about once a week, despite his health problems.

1174 – Dad’s unexplained neck/back pain is better.

1175 – Two years of Lindsey as our daughter. (Kathryn and Lindsey in the kitchen.)

1176 – Clear reminders of why I write, and how God can use it.

1177 – The state has approved us for another foster-adoption.

1178 – More old-fashioned plants from Ken’s “MawMaw.” She has an amazing green thumb and can make anything grow, and now that she knows I love plants, she’s started rooting me new ones from cuttings of hers. This time she gave me pink angel trumpets, and she’s working on a white rose for me.

1179 – Safe travels to and fro in all our Christmas-ing this weekend.

1180 – Another Christmas celebration at my Dad’s house in the mountains. Ken took this photo of my dad with all of us girls: daughters, grand-daughters, and great-grand-daughters.

1181 – The pleasure of photographing my littlest grand-niece, who is TOO cute for words! (Feel free to try!)

-> In the coming week, I pray that you (and I) recognize even the smallest of blessings.

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts Tagged With: holidays, photography

More December Gifts { 1157 – 1167 }

on December 12, 2011

Once again… counting gifts.

1157 – The smell of pumpkin muffins in the oven.

1158 – How much Kathryn enjoys creative pursuits – like loom-knitting hats!

1159 – Getting classes Kathryn is excited about for next semester’s enrichment classes.

1160 – Chatting and catching up with my cousin Jonnia while waiting at the long registration for classes.

1161 – Being nearly done with Christmas shopping – and staying within our budget.

1162 – Not-too-difficult crossword puzzles.

1163 – Selling my treadmill, and getting to catch up with an old friend in the process.

1164 – An ice pack when I hurt a muscle in my back.

1165 – An early Christmas present from my mom, something I’ve wanted for probably a decade: a KitchenAid stand mixer — and in my super-favorite color!

1166 – A safe trip for Lindsey and the rest of the NROTC drill team for last weekend’s competition.

1167 – Knowing I can be completely honest with my husband, and he’ll still love me.

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts

Because I Need More Gratitude {1146 – 1156}

on December 5, 2011

I’m having a hard time with a few things in my life right now. As a result, I’m having difficulty focusing on the important things. My quiet times have been half-hearted, and I feel as if my prayers are bouncing off the ceiling. Of course I know they aren’t, but I’ve been feeling somewhat disconnected. When that happens, I know God hasn’t gone anywhere; the disconnect is on my end.

One thing that helps me refocus is to be more intentional about gratitude. Gratitude tends to crowd out doubt, fear, worry, and sadness. So once again, I’m counting gifts.

1146 – Finding gifts to purchase that benefit worthwhile organizations like Mercy House Kenya and Thousand Hills Coffee.

1147 – Our Christmas cards are really cute.

1148 – A fun day of touring historic homes with my mom, my aunt Beckie, and two of my cousins Shannon and Jonnia. We had so much fun we might just make this Christmas Home Tour an annual tradition.

1149 – My uncle lives near enough to my dad to check on him, and the timing of my uncle’s job loss was exactly when Dad needs someone to stop by more often.

1150 – My grandmother is able to live with my aunt; my aunt is willing to have her live there; and they live around the corner from me.

1151 – Peppermint mocha coffee creamer.

1152 – A lunch date with Ken on Friday, and starting our Saturday with time to sit and talk.

1153 – Photographing another happy couple expecting their first child. Another chance to celebrate a new life.

1154 – Pretty wrapping paper for gifts.

1155 – Encouraging testimonies shared in church yesterday.

1156 – This printable I found through my friend Tricia (a.k.a HodgepodgeMom), originally shared by Ann at A Holy Experience:

Source: aholyexperience.com via Jamie on Pinterest

May your eyes — and mine — be open to the many blessings that surround us this week, and every day.

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Filed Under: thousand-gifts

Thanksgiving Reflections

on November 28, 2011

We’ve had a delightful Thanksgiving week. I’ve been thinking about the importance of traditions, and I’ve realized that I tend to not want to make a big deal of special occasions because in my mind, it’s merely setting us (or maybe just me) up for disappointment. However, with our mixed-up, crazily-blended family, we need those things that identify us as family.

In all my growing-up years, every big holiday was celebrated at my grandparents’ house. When their health began to fail, the hosting jumped around from various aunt’s or cousins’ homes. Thanksgiving seems to have fallen by the wayside. So I hosted this year, and I’d like this to become a tradition. Besides the fact I enjoy it, when we host at our home, it allows the flexibility of time. If we hadn’t hosted this year, we wouldn’t have seen Brandon and Diane at all, but they squeezed in a visit with us on Thanksgiving morning before heading to Diane’s parents’ home for lunch and then Brandon’s mom’s house for supper.

I was very excited we managed to get a family photo done while Diane and Brandon were here, too! I’d given up on the possibility for this year because our schedules have been so whacky. There weren’t going to be any Christmas cards from us this year, but now they’re ordered and on their way here. They totally reflect our family’s personality. (I’ll share after I’ve mailed them out!)

My dad came to visit, even though he couldn’t enjoy the feast. (He did, however, take some coffee through his feeding tube. I’m not sure how good an idea that was, but he wanted some SO badly and it smelled so good. I just wish he could’ve tasted it, as that’s something he’s always enjoyed.) Here my dad is showing my mom and my Grandmama pictures on the back of his camera of the bear he skinned, and the resulting bearskin rug.

Friends have asked if it’s difficult having my divorced parents at the same get-togethers. They’ve been divorced for about twenty years, so the wounds are not fresh, and I think they’ve learned to appreciate each other again. And in recent times they’ve gotten along even better since they’ve both had reminders about how short life is. My mom’s side of the family still loves my dad just as much as if my parents were still married. My Granmama, who has been in poor health lately and knew about my dad’s health issues, really wanted to see Dad. When they hugged when he first came in, they both got emotional for just a minute, which made me get teary-eyed. I realize, at times like that, that this could easily be the last Thanksgiving I have with either of them. But then again, that could be said about any of the rest of my family or friends – or myself. I must live this life!

I’m thankful for my daughters, and for their hugs!

Lacy the WonderDog spent much of her Thanksgiving quietly (and effectively) begging for a bite of our feast. She has honed her subtle begging into an artform.

I enjoy the times of just hanging out and chatting with the family after our bellies are full, too. (And I’ve recently rearranged my living room again!)

I shot a maternity session on Friday, but other than that, we had a relaxing day, ate leftovers, decorated the tree, and watched Christmas movies. (Instagram photo.)

By Saturday, we were all ready for a little time out of the house, so we ran errands, and went out to eat something other than turkey. Ken and I hardly ever have photos taken of the two of us together, and since we ended up having an unplanned coordinating-but-not-matching-outfit day, it seemed like a swell day to ask Lindsey to snap a few photos of us.

And then I turned the camera around on the girls. I love-love-love those times when my girls laugh and enjoy each other. These sisterly moments don’t happen all the time, but I believe that on those occasions when they do, it’s more genuine now than it was a couple of years ago. It’s still hard to believe that we’re just now coming up on the second anniversary of Lindsey’s adoption; we all keep thinking it’s been longer than that.

I hope you and your family enjoyed a blessed Thanksgiving as well, and that we all learn to cultivate a heart of thankfulness every day of the year. In that spirit, I’m adding to my thousand gifts list again…

1131- a home and food and things that make it possible to host a feast
1132 – hugs from my daughters
1133 – sisterly moments
1134 - how time and love has made Lindsey a true daughter of our hearts
1135 - holiday traditions
1136 – kisses from Ken
1137 – the look on our girls’ faces when we kiss; I believe it reassures them all is well
1138 – old emotional wounds that are slowly healing
1139 – reminiscing over the stories behind sentimental Christmas ornaments
1140 – another layer of happy memories added to my own storehouse, and my childrens’
1141 – hearing my dad laugh, even though he can’t talk
1142 – photographing milestones like a first pregnancy
1143 - a very cute dog who is delightfully happy with a morsel from my plate
1144 – my new grand-niece, born two weeks ago
1145 – watching cheesy old Christmas movies with my family