A blogland friend recently shared with me about her son’s struggle and wanted to share her story to help others, but understandably, she preferred not to share on her own blog. Since this is something I feel strongly about, I offered to let Katey share her story here… [Quick aside added to answer a reader’s concern: yes, this young man did give his mom permission to share his story here on my blog.]
I found out my son was looking at pornography when he had forgotten to clear the history of the computer. He had been looking at sites for awhile. When I first asked him, he said it was our oldest son. He then confessed and said it started with MySpace ads. I had a MySpace so I could monitor his friends. I had no idea what else I should have been keeping an eye on.
He went to a Christian conference for teens and came home on fire for God. He even quit his job as a life guard because of the environment. I thought he was ok. That he had BEAT the beast.
Some time passed and he confessed that this was a HUGE ongoing problem. He was addicted!
We decided to put Covenant Eyes on the computer, but after a few months of internet slowdown and issues, I asked if he thought he would be okay without the filter. He said he was fine and to remove them wouldn’t be an issue. We removed it, and that was a HUGE mistake. He was not okay.
Always have filters! Even if the computer is in the same room as you.
This was three years ago. He is still fighting the beast. He has a group of guys in our church that he is accountable to. He lapsed once that we know of and was able to be brought back around. He has repented and is on the right track again. He has also shared his testimony with his young adult group so his buddies can hold him accountable.
He’ll always be my little boy.
I pray for families that have this beast in their lives.
I also pray for the girls and women that feel the need to be on the other side! My heart aches for them!
I applaud Katey’s son for being willing to be accountable, but we all need to be aware of what a HUGE issue this is, even within the Christian community! We know Christian husbands and fathers who have nearly had their marriage and their family torn apart over this issue. We know boys within our church family who are addicted to porn, and we know girls who who have shared these kinds of photos of themselves via cell phones. Many cell phones have internet and data-sending capabilities, so those filters are just as important on phones as on computers!
We are failing at protecting our children in this area, even within Christian families and churches! This is vitally important to our children’s hearts and to their future marriages! Satan is having a field day with our kids and families in the area of sex; he is perverting what God intended to be beautiful, and making it into something twisted and dirty.
Let’s fight back!