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I’ve seen what living looks like.

9 November, 2011; Filed Under: family & home

Just two weeks before his weary body gave into the decade-long battle with the cancer that had eaten his body and his bones from the inside out and caused pain most of us cannot even imagine, a young man named John wrote these words in his journal:

“I love You, Lord. I love how You give me words when I have none. You give me the lyrics when my song is dull or weak. I love singing for for You, to You. Praising your name – I wish my voice and fingers would allow me all day long.”

I didn’t know John well, but I am forever changed by his example. As this week marks the first anniversary of his passing, I want to share a little about John with you, too. I’ve been wanting to write this post for a long time, but it’s been difficult choosing which of my many thoughts to put into this post.

what living looks like

Cancer could never conquer John Evans’ faith.

I knew of John and his family through mutual friends, and heard about John’s battle with a rare form of bone cancer diagnosed when he was just ten years old. One Sunday morning about two years ago, my family ended up sitting a row behind John’s family in church. I knew from our mutual friend that he was dealing with new tumors aggressively attacking his bones, and that he was in a great deal of pain, particularly in his arms and legs, so I was surprised to see him in church. This had been one of those mornings when I was grumbling about having a headache, and I didn’t really want to go to church. I was there begrudgingly. But John wanted so badly to worship in the fellowship of other believers that he was there despite his pain — and when the worship music began, John stood on his painful legs and held his tumor-riddled arms high in worship. I have never been so dramatically humbled. That was the first time I met John Evans.

Everyone who ever met him seems to have a John Evans story.

John was a good-looking and polite young man with a firm handshake, a genuine smile, a direct gaze, and a strong personality. But there was something more than that, something hard to pinpoint or describe; I believe it was the light of Jesus shining though.

“We’re all terminal…”

In church one Sunday morning, the pastor interviewed John as part of the sermon. John talked openly about a time in his teens that brought him truly and desperately to the feet of Jesus, when he had become addicted to pain medication. That low was when he had fully given his life to Christ. As he continued to talk about living with cancer, dealing with pain, and facing death, John said he didn’t want to waste whatever time he had to live. He referred to Hebrews 12, and said,

“We are all terminal… If you aren’t running the race with all you’ve got, why bother running at all?”

My friendship with John’s mom Kimberly began when she saw a post on my blog about a few kids available for adoption. One was Lindsey’s friend Deanna, then almost 17 years old. Kimberly felt a nudge from God about adopting her, and called me to discuss it. When she brought the idea to her family to consider, John was enthusiastically in favor of doing so. He loved Deanna as a sister even before he met her, and they seemed to have a special bond. Five months later, Deanna’s adoption was finalized by phone while the family sat in John’s bed because he had become too sick to leave the house.

Going home.

Although John loved life, his illness made him eager to “go home.” When he finally did, his family was heartbroken to lose John — but they were thankful he was no longer in pain, and that he was finally in the arms of the Savior he loved so much.

There were tears at John’s memorial service, but mostly, there was worship, and there were many good memories and testimonies shared about John’s life.

The worship team who playing at the service had visited John a week or two before. They didn’t plan to sing on this visit, but just stop by to lift his spirits a little. Kimberly explained to them that John’s bones were as porous as coral, being eaten away by tumors. But John asked Brett, the lead singer, to pick up his guitar and play. So they sang, and John worshiped with his hands held high. When he couldn’t hold them up any longer, he asked his dad to help hold them up. Brett said that heaven came down to John’s room that day, and it was an experience he’d never forget.

One long-time friend shared about a time John came to visit him at college. John wandered off, wearing jeans and a cowboy hat (but no shoes) to look for a quiet place to read his Bible. When John’s friend found him hours later, he was surrounded by a crowd, leading an impromptu Bible study with a group of students he’d never met before.

Through tears, John’s girlfriend told about one of their first dates, when they went to a worship concert and John kneeled at her feet to pray for her. She shared from the letters John had written to remind her of her worth in Christ. He told her, “The King is enthralled by your beauty.“

John’s parents read excerpts from his journals. His dad said it’s usually the parents who teach the children, but he felt that in his case, it was the other way around.

“I believe my time is short and I need to make the best use of my time as I am able. I know I need to be constantly pursuing You so I can lead others to You. Only through You can I do this, and I believe You are faithful. You will stretch me and help me reach out my short arms. My God is my guide, I can’t get lost. He is my light. He gives me armor; I can’t be hurt. My family and friends will fight along side of me. When the battle has been won, I will lay down. I will kneel and bow my head so I get no honor, no glory but to the One who gave us glory- the One who is mighty to save, Creator of all things- the One who is Love, who lives in me and directs me! God, You are so good!” Journal entry, Oct. 15 (less than one month before John’s passing)

The following week, pastor Louie Giglio from Passion City Church gave a powerful sermon inspired by John: Fully Alive. I encourage you to take the time to listen to it.

After John’s death, his family chose to keep his facebook page active, and they occasionally share words from his journal or from some of his favorite devotions. But what is even more moving is the stories people share on his facebook wall: stories of how John touched their lives through his vivacious way of living and loving. John never backed down from the speaking the truth, sometimes so boldly it was humorous, but it was always done in love.

A life well-lived lives on.

John taught me most of all that a life well-lived really can make an eternal difference. John was only twenty-one when he died, but his influence continues on. How many folks live decades longer than John, yet never make an eternal impact on this world?

Will you be there with John in heaven? If you’re not sure, please pray about it. I know that John would be delighted to greet you and call you friend, even if he never knew you on this earth.

John fishing

And if you are sure about your salvation, are you really living your life? Are you running your race with all you’ve got? I’m not, yet; not really. But because of John Evans, I’ve seen what it looks like to live.

Jamie

Wife, mama, homeschooler, dog-wrangler. Introvert who finds joy in good books, sunshine, and authentic conversation. Fitness enthusiast and strength coach. Often seen with a steaming mug of tea in hand.

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Jeanne
Jeanne
9 November, 2011 9:57 am

What an inspiring story of an inspiring young man. Thanks, Jamie.

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jennifer kindle
jennifer kindle
9 November, 2011 10:01 am

thank you for sharing this…it helped me gather my thoughts about my post on this past weekend in prison. living fully and in the freedom of Christ is a sight to witness. i will be linking you once I get a chance to post. thank you for always being a source of encouragement!!

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Barrett Johnson
Barrett Johnson
9 November, 2011 10:18 am

You perfectly and wonderfully captured John’s life. I’m in tears reflecting on John and worshiping God while sitting here in my office this morning. Thanks for this!

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Sheila Wray Gregoire
Sheila Wray Gregoire
9 November, 2011 10:55 am

Oh, Jamie, that was so beautifully written. What I find so encouraging is how God was there for John and helped John experience Him in such a powerful way. Often when we hear “horrible” stories of children who die young, or horrific accidents, or tragedies, we think, “I could never handle that. I don’t know what I would do.” And we’re right. We couldn’t handle that, the way we are now. But the thing is, if it ever did happen to us, God would show up. God would carry us. God would help us worship. You can’t handle it now,… Read more »

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chrissi
chrissi
9 November, 2011 1:04 pm

what a beautiful post, Jamie! thank you for sharing your heart through John’s inspiring story!

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Tonya @ The Traveling Praters
Tonya @ The Traveling Praters
9 November, 2011 1:36 pm

Jamie, I couldn’t help but shed a few tears while reading your post- and I never had the pleasure of meeting this young man or his family, you have written such a precious tribute. May we all run the race that has been set before us, with all we’ve got. Thank you for this encouragement. 🙂

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Stephanie
Stephanie
9 November, 2011 2:34 pm

Well said. He was a remarkable young man.

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Kris @ Weird, Unsocialized Homeschoolers
Kris @ Weird, Unsocialized Homeschoolers
9 November, 2011 2:48 pm

What a powerful testimony of a life well-lived. I never put two and two together and realized that it was John’s family that adopted Deanna. That is so cool how God wove your two families together, but even more cool how the thread of John’s life is woven through so many lives because he allowed God to work through him in such a powerful way. Thank you for the reminder to run this race with all I’ve got.

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Amy Lynne
Amy Lynne
9 November, 2011 2:58 pm

What a beautiful tribute you have written about an amazing young man! I was at John’s memorial service and I will be forever inspired by his testimony.

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Kristina
Kristina
9 November, 2011 7:01 pm

Wow, that was a tear jerker! What a neat testimony he had (and has)! Puts so many of us to shame.
Thanks for writing this Jamie, it must have been hard to do.

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Sharla
Sharla
9 November, 2011 7:10 pm

You wrote an incredible tribute of a young man with a life well lived. This was beautiful and captured a faith that is something I aspire to have, a faith lived with complete abandon. I struggle with fear when it comes to openly sharing my faith with others in the way that he did, but it is what I want. I can only imagine how difficult it is for John’s parents, but I pray that his words and faith and knowing that they will see him again are a comfort to them. Thank you for sharing John’s story. It is… Read more »

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Patti
Patti
10 November, 2011 9:39 am

Thank you for writing about this beautiful brother in Christ. I am moved and inspired.

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Ellen
Ellen
10 November, 2011 5:57 pm

A beautiful depiction of a faith-filled journey.

No, I’m not running the race with all I’ve got. Lots of time I’m moping or slogging or crawling or … you name it. As John pointed out, we’re all terminal; we should live like it.

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Geoff
Geoff
11 November, 2011 1:54 am

Really say that you wrote an extraordinary tribute of a younger man with a existence nicely lived. This was stunning and captured a faith that is a thing I aspire to have, a faith lived with comprehensive abandon. I battle with worry when it comes to openly sharing my faith with other individuals in the way that he did, but it is what I want. I can only envision how challenging it is for John’s parents, but I pray that his words and faith and understanding that they will see him again are a comfort and ease to them.

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Natasha
Natasha
14 November, 2011 4:01 am

Wow! This was so moving. Thank you so much for sharing. I needed this.

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Penny
Penny
22 November, 2011 6:10 pm

Oh my! I was moved to tears reading this. Wow! What an amazing story! Thanks for sharing!

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Deanna
Deanna
12 November, 2015 1:45 pm

Wow. A true legacy lived for the Author of Life. I’m inspired:)

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