Last week, I talked to Scout and Jem’s former foster mom. Right now, they’re fostering eight kids, including a sibling group of four. (They’ve fostered over 120 kids so far!) That sibling group recently met their soon-to-be adoptive parents, so their foster mom was asking me how she could help prepare the new parents. I told her I think anyone going into older child or foster adoption has somewhat rose-colored glasses, and that optimism is a good thing — as long as it’s tempered with reality.
That conversation got me thinking (like most conversations do, which is why I like them). The past two-and-a-half years since we adopted the youngest two has felt like trying to gain my footing in quicksand. I keep expecting things to level out, but it’s still hard. I’m thankful I keep a journal because I can look back and see how far we’ve come — but it’s a slow climb.
So I come around once again to this: if I adopted so I could have a perfect Christmas-card-ready family, then I made a big mistake. But if it was to fulfill a call to mother these children, then I simply need to keep on stepping up to the challenge every. single. day/hour/minute.
After all, life doesn’t have to be easy to be good.
Currently, more than 108,000 children in the U.S. foster care system are waiting for a permanent family. That means parental rights have been surrendered or terminated, so they are literally or legally parentless.
Since this is National Adoption Month, AdoptUSkids has a few (humorous) words about the need for older-child adoption in this video:
Each year more than 20,000 kids will age out of care, sent off into the adult world with no family. Statistics show this puts them at greater risk of homelessness, underemployment, and health challenges throughout their lives. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
In honor of National Adoption Month, I’m re-sharing a few of my most popular no-rainbows-or-unicorns adoption posts.
(What to say; what NOT to say.)
Don’t miss the free printable.
Friends, thanks for reading. I appreciate every time you share my posts, or email me about how they’ve touched you; it’s why I keep writing, even about the hard things. Follow along by subscribing to my weekly email updates.
Wife, mom, grandma. Introvert who finds joy in good books, sunshine, and authentic conversation. Fitness enthusiast and personal trainer. Often seen with a steaming mug of tea in hand.