Lately I’ve been having difficulty being still.
As an introvert, quiet downtime is vital for me. My need for stillness is in direct proportion to how loud/busy my life is; for the first 40 years of my existence, I didn’t recognize the correlation — but becoming mama to two young children very close in age taught me quickly. I’m doing better handling it all than I did in the beginning, but to remain a reasonably nice person, I need time to just be.
In the past few weeks, I’m finding myself more inclined to pick up my iphone to check the weather (again) or scroll through my instagram feed (again) than sit quietly outside accompanied only by my hummingbirds as company. It’s the mental equivalent of reaching for a bag of potato chips instead of veggies and hummus. But it’s not a technology addiction problem; the real culprit is my constantly spinning mind. Quiet lets it spin at full-throttle, and sometimes I want to dial down the speed.
Things have been busy here and they’re about to get busier. We’re gearing up for an out-of-state move. Yep, this is THE move we’ve been wanting, to our favorite little beach town where we’ll make our home in a cottage near the sea. We are terrifiededly-excited; I don’t know of a word that combines the two emotions, so I’m making up my own. We’re throwing off the bowlines.
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” — Mark Twain
I’ve been de-cluttering like a mad woman, and we’ve worked hard at getting the house ready to sell, but there is still much to do! We still have to sell this house and figure out exactly where we’re going to live when it does sell. And I’ll be dealing with life as a pseudo-single parent when Ken moves before the rest of us so he can start a new job there while I keep on homeschooling and managing a house full of kids and dogs back here in Georgia.
When my head is spinning, stillness doesn’t come easy. But it’s essential to my sanity, so I’m going to have to work harder on making sure I enforce my own quiet here and there throughout the days.
I might be a crazy person for a while, but I’ll keep you updated on this adventure!